Advice
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A Daily Struggle: ‘But what will they think?!’

Last week I posted a picture on my Instagram stories with a poll. I wasn’t having a good day and I felt I was a bit lost with what I was doing with my life and I asked if anyone ever felt the same, and it got 20+ responses for ‘Yes‘. It got me thinking. How much of your life do you spend ( waste ) worrying about other people’s opinion on your life? Honestly, I probably spend the majority of mine. Any decision I make or idea I have always comes with another thought; ‘But what will they think?‘. Social media obviously has a massive role to play in this but even outside of it there is so much judgement.

I don’t know about you, but I feel very pressured to have the right job, wear the right clothes or have an amazing house etc etc. All the things that you think will make people proud of you or admire you. Should it matter if someone makes £15k a year or if someone makes £105k a year? Or if someone stays in a 1 bed flat and someone else stays in a five bed detached? WE all do it. WE all judge others just as much as we worry how much others judge us. In the end, what actual difference does it make? Why are we so desperate to impress everyone and be perfect? Perfection doesn’t even exist!

For a while, I thought it was just me so decided to do a little research to why I felt like this. Apparently, wanting to ‘fit in‘ is one of the six basic human needs. It works in a way that each time you do something that gains approval from others, you get a high. But, the high only lasts so long before it goes away. So, you do it again and get another high and keep going round and round and round. That is when you know you need to try change the way you think. Approval from others doesn’t make you happy, you might think it does. But it actually doesn’t. It’s like Instagram, you post a picture and get loads of likes and feel like your so popular. So, you post the same kind of picture again hoping for the same response.

*I wasn’t sure about adding this part in but bugger it. I decided to have a think of some of the things I would maybe like to do, if I didn’t feel so judged (ironically, your all going to judge me over this list LOL! But breaking that barrier is what this post is about so); 1. Be more open about exploring religion and God, and how it makes me feel better, 2. I’d concentrate on making an independent income, as having flexibility to be at home and create a good home life for my Husband is massively important to me, 3. I’d Vlog  through Insta Stories and You Tube.

I’m trying hard not to worry about what other people think and just do what suits me. If I decide to stay in this little house for the rest of my days then, thats ok. If I decide to have 20 more jobs before I retire, thats ok. If I drive the same car for the next 10 years then, thats ok too! Life is about being happy and enjoying your time. It’s just a thought, but maybe try take it into consideration tonight. We are always going to be judged, its in our human nature, but isn’t it better to be judged based on doing something that makes you happy rather than doing something for the sake of others?

What are the things you’d like to do but feel people would judge you too much?

Until next time,

xox

 

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2 Comments

  1. It takes many, many years to reach a point where you really don’t give a f* what anyone else thinks about what you do, wear, or say. By the time you reach that point, everyone just figures you’ve gone senile – but that’s ok, too, if it allows the freedom you’ve wanted your entire life.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This makes me so sad, that these thoughts are holding you back!!
    I make a conscious effort not to judge people, unless I feel what they are doing is offensive or hurting others. I think the less we judge others, we are less like likely to think that other people might be judging us, or maybe its just something that has come with age! I won’t say it never crosses my mind when I do things or share content but if it does I definitely don’t dwell on it, we can’t ever please everyone and what if they do judge us, it doesn’t hurt! You go follow your heart, who cares what everyone else thinks 🙂

    Like

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